Precarious did not last long as the Director of the Museum of Modern Terrible Dead Art (MoMTDA, pronounced “Mom, Ta-DAA!”) He was unqualified for the job in every way, except for when large pieces of art needed to be moved in and out of the halls, which he always supervised . Also, three or four days into the job, he excused himself from a meeting and walked to his car and didn’t come back for a week. He did that a couple of times, and then the Board decided to make Precarious the Director Emeritus and hire someone who knew what they were doing.
The job search was intensive: all of the band members’ wives and girlfriends were asked if they wanted to do it, and then anyone who was hanging around Front Street. When they all said no, the Board starting calling other museums and universities and asking for recommendations like normal people.
There were artists and curators from every school, but none of them seemed to fit. The geometric abstractionists were all vaguely square, and the outsider artists refused to enter the building. An interview was set up with a founding member of the Found Art school, but she got lost on the way in. The minimalists offered little at the meeting, and the post-minimalists even less; Everyone was convinced the Neo-postists were just making it up as they went, but they did get in a fight with the Post-neoists in the lobby, which was fun.
For weeks, Front Street was a revolving door of the most pretentious Americans and ludicrous foreigners you’d ever seen. Some of them were barefoot, but in an expensive way.
Kitty Hawk didn’t have an appointment, partially because no one had been answering the phone since Billy ripped it out of the wall, but when she walked in and said that the main gallery should switch spaces with the gift shop, she was hired on the spot.