Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Another Open Letter To The Internet About My Beloved Ad-Blocker

Dear The Internet:

I will never turn off my ad-blocker. I know I already wrote you one of these open letters stating my firmly-held and well-reasoned convictions about never turning off my ad-blocker, but you keep asking like a child hoping to wear down his mother and get a toy. You will not get a toy, The Internet.

Were I a stronger man, I would put you in a sack and drown you in a river, The Internet, just like unwanted puppies on a farm in the past, but I cannot do that, so instead I will download the strongest and least reasonable ad-blocker I can find, and I will keep that fucker updated to within an inch of its life. If you install an ad-blocker blocker, then I will fetch the handful of lines of code that defeats it.

You need to understand, The Internet, how this battle of attrition will end: with me not going to your site. There is no outcome in which your information is more important than not getting infected with the Russian computer-AIDS infesting all your filthy ads. I will give up on you–or simply find  mirrored site, or a reprint of the article–before shutting off my ad-blocker.

I lock my door, The Internet, because the world is full of bad actors and the hungry; you cannot have a key.

Sincerely,
TotD

4 Comments

  1. So would you like to share the particulars of that “strongest and least reasonable ad-blocker” so I can get it, cuz…..agreed.

    • Thoughts On The Dead

      October 3, 2016 at 9:10 pm

      Can’t go wrong with Adblocker Plus, but some people like uBlock. I use the former. You must install one: changes the entire internet for the better.

  2. “we notice that you are using Adblocker”

    Hell yes I am using Adblocker, and the fact that you noticed, proves that my choice was the right choice.

    ToTD is so right here.

  3. I find a Solomon Islands IP address is highly effective.

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