Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Answers Without Context From A Phil Q-And-A

phil green shirt talking

  • Yes.
  • No.
  • Sometimes, but only if no one’s eaten Indian food in the past couple days.
  • Johnny Bench.
  • None of your business.
  • I don’t know.
  • Whatever Shapiro said his cut was, it was half of that.
  • Phillip.
  • No, it’s not Philbert.
  • Well, I don’t care what the internet says: my name is Phillip.
  • Around a dozen, I guess.
  • Billy knows what he did.
  • So does Mickey.
  • Bobby probably doesn’t know.
  • I’m sorry your meatloaf was overcooked, but that’s a problem for your waiter, not a Grateful Dead.
  • On my side, with a pillow in between my knees.
  • Hundred and forty-two pounds, but twenty of that’s cock.
  • No, you can’t buy me a drink.
  • Well, first off: I own the place, so I already bought the booze.
  • Second: tapered off on the hooch when the liver exploded.
  • I don’t think I’ve ever considered rapping the Donor Rap, no.
  • A cordial relationship, I suppose you could call it; can’t get too friendly with Fake Jerries or they start getting ideas and then you gotta throw ’em off the bus halfway through Minnesota.
  • I haven’t spoken to Ned Lagin in a few years.
  • Actually, seeing him naked was something Trey insisted on before he signed the contracts.
  • Bernie Sanders.


  1. He looks happy

  2. “Yes its true, Pete Shapiro is the secret love child of Bobby and Marge Schott.”

  3. • Did you buy that shirt yourself?

    • Did you see Jill before you went out this evening?

    • Are you still able to levitate?

    • How did you beat the Jefferson Airplane in that one game?

    • Did you pay him?

    • Do you know how much Bench is claiming in back-pay and compensation?

    • Who is your favourite Macedonian?

    • Is that because his name is like yours, Philbert?

    • The internet says you can’t remember your own name half the time. Is that true?

    • How many times have you forgotten your own name in the last two days?

    • Do you blame anyone for your memory problems?

    • Billy says he loves all the surviving Grateful Deads.

    • Will Bobby be out with some new incarnation of the final shows in 2016?

    • What is your favourite Drumz segment?

    • What is your favourite sex position?

    • What was Pig’s fighting weight?

    • If you had refrained from singing Dark Star I would have bought you a drink.

    • How do you get away with singing lead?

    • Do you have to get drunk before you sing?

    • The Donor Rap is meant to be a rap, yes?

    • Have you ever considered extending the hand of friendship to guitar players in your band?

    • Have you had any new musical ideas you want to explore with Ned Lagin?

    • How much did you know about Tres Astonishment before the Fare The Well Shows?

    • If there was one person you could kick out of the 2016 Presidential race, who would that be?

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