Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Are You Ready For A Bummer?

Please fuck off with the Bill Murray: it’s enough, we get it, what a brave and innovative position to take. Does he like the Cubs? Does he have an 800-number instead of an agent? Does he arble garble yarble shut the fuck up.

“BUT HE THOUGHT THAT THE COEN BROTHERS DIRECTED THE GARFIELD MOVIE.”

No, he fucking didn’t, not for one single fucking second.

When I hear people talk about their love for Bill Murray, I silently substitute the word “bacon” for his name, and all the sentences still make sense because the same bunch of trendsucking windowlickers that loved bacon now worship Dr. Venkman.

It’s the same bullshit, the bacon nonsense and the Murray foolishness: these are two things that no one doesn’t like. (Except for cardiologists and ex-wives, respectively.) How about blowjobs, do you like them? Naps? What about money? Do you like money? Because liking money is precisely as original as liking Bill Murray.

Don’t get me wrong: I’m a fan of the man’s, but I’ve also sat through that fucking elephant movie.

10 Comments

  1. Hen should have won an Oscar for Meatballs.

  2. Jay Blakesberg was just talking about how Bill Murray tried to fight him at Fare Thee Well. It sounds typical of a celebrity drunk on his own liquor (that he allegedly shares with George Clooney).

    • Thoughts On The Dead

      October 29, 2016 at 5:59 pm

      I wanna hear this story.

      • So Jay was the official photographer for FTW, and of course was backstage taking pictures of everyone, including two of Bill. Later, Jay was talking with Mike Gordon outside Bob’s dressing room, and Mike said ” Hey, could you get a pic of me with Bill if he comes out of there?”, to which Jay said “Yeah, man.” Bill comes out a little bit later and Jay says, “Hey Bill, do you know Mike Gordon from Phish?” Bill looks at him and says “Me and Mike Gordon; we’re all good. You and me though? We’re not good. Stop fucking stalking me.” And he walks away.

        Later, after the show when Jay had uploaded all his pics and put his cameras away, someone invited him to Phil’s dressing room where everyone was drinking tequila (either Bill Murray’s brand or George Clooney’s brand). Bill was there as well, and everyone was having fun and taking pictures. Jay ends up getting one of Bill on his cellphone, and Bill storms over. “HEY! I thought I told you to stop stalking me! That’s it, you and me are gonna settle this; outside, right now!” Jay was rather taken aback, not wanting to fight a celebrity drunk on their own liquor, kind of stammered and finally put his hand on Bill’s shoulder and said, “Bill, you and me; we’re all good.” Bill thought for a moment and said, “Yeah, you’re right man,” and walked off into the night.

  3. what elephant movie?

    my husband ran a race and was sponsored by a group called mutual funds against child abuse. mfac. who is FOR child abuse? but i do still love bill murray.

  4. Not a Cubs fan or a Bill Murray fan, so he can go away with your suck ass mashup of Harry Caray & Daffy Duck singing Take Me Out to the Ballgame(it’s hard to make an abysmal song even worse, but Bill nailed it so I give him credit). Only a long suffering fan of the Lovable Losers could have found anything remotely entertaining about that version though. Maybe after a century of futility they would trash this tradition, but they’re the Cubs fans after all. The only bummer will be if the Cubs win the Series as their winning could signal an impending apocalypse. It would be such a Cubs ending to have the superior team in almost every aspect and then lose(Francona’s managerial moves have been better than Maddon’s thus far and have been a major difference. I bet Tito would take pleasure in sticking it to former boss Theo Epstein). Go Tribe!

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