Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Bass Phishing

phil mike gordon txr onstage

It is the year 2018. Due to death, disease, acrimonious lawsuits, prison sentences, and foreign prison sentences, there are only enough musicians to form one classic rock band. It makes festival season a lot simpler, but some people feel the whole experience is lacking. Also it’s all bass players.


This is from today at Phil’s (remember Phil?) restaurant; it was called the Big Bass Bash, and I swear to you that I thought the theme was fish. I saw another photo of just Mike, and I still didn’t figure out that the “a” was long.”


If you’re in a jam band, and you try to play a normal four-string bass like a human being, then men from the jam band union come and break your shoulders.


“Looooooove you.”

“Thank you, Mike.”

“Looooooove you.”

“Stop looking at me like that.”

“Looooooove you.”

“Play your bass, young man.”




Heisenberg on drums.


Phil is wearing his summer flannel.


“How’s the tour going?”

“Great, Phil. Having so much fun. Making great music.”

“Big crowds?”

“Yeah, but they hate us.”


“Phantasy Tour is crowdfunding hitmen.”

“I have no idea what that is, but I do like starting words that begin with ‘F’ with ‘Ph.’ You guys kinda stole that from me. Hitmen?”

“Yeah. To come and murder us for playing the songs wrong, or in the wrong order, or not long enough, or too long. Something.”

“Internet’s full of lunatics and obsessives.”

“There’s a motion to have Page impeached.”

“What does that even mean?”

“I hoped you knew.”


The longer I look at this picture, the harder I laugh.


  1. Mean, Green, Devil Eating Machine

    July 18, 2016 at 10:23 am

    Phil – under the boardwalk!

    (Under the boardwalk) we’ll be havin’ some fun…

  2. Shop Steward, Local 415

  3. Alls I know is John Molo is a bad ass motherfucker, even in that silly hat

    • Mean, Green, Devil Eating Machine

      July 19, 2016 at 9:36 am

      Even more so because they made him play in out in the sun. And behind all the amps. So no one could really see him. But you could hear him.

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