Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Beat It On Down The Wine

Raise A Glass Of The Grateful

When you think of wine, you think of Canadian archivists, so this Cabernet Sauvignon (that’s French for “the stuff that’s not Merlot”) blended by David Lemieuxscatel will delight the palates of both rich winos, who are called oenophiles, and poor winos, who are called winos.

I’m not knowledgeable enough about wine to know whether “blending” is an actual thing that layman can do, or just ad copy bullshit. Is there an actual blender involved? This is what I see happening:

SHZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

SLURP

“Missin’ something, eh?”

“Yup.”

“Hand me that cup of Tim Horton’s”

GLUGglugglug

SHZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

SLURP

“There ya go.”

(Fun fact: the person David was talking to in that little skit was Whoopi Goldberg. They’re friends.)

Wait: I know what happened now. This is the website for the plonk and this paragraph is on it:

Starting with sourcing premium grapes for this special Reserve Cabernet Sauvignon, we brought in Grateful Dead archivist David Lemieux for a one-on-one blending session at the vineyard with our top winemakers, and wrapped it all up in a one-of-a-kind bottle that brings to life the great essence and personality of the Dead.

Someone got himself a Napa vacation is what I’m getting from that blurb, plus a couple of cases of wine to throw in the trunk for the ride home. I fully approve of this licensing decision.

Finally–and I hate to nitpick–all wine is limited edition. By definition.

14 Comments

  1. “…wrapped it up in a… bottle that brings to life… [the] personality of the Dead.”

    ah yes
    because nothing says the grateful fucking dead, maaaaan, like themed wine from bitch ass Canadians

  2. Sir Luther Von Baconson

    October 6, 2015 at 8:12 am

  3. Bonnie Lass of Fenario

    October 6, 2015 at 11:05 am

    “With just 250 cases made and limited availablity at Winesthatrock.com, the 2012 Reserve Cabernet Sauvignon was blended using “Eyes of the World” (9/7/73 – Winemaker Mark Beaman’s choice) and “Dark Star” (2/13/70 – David Lemieux’s choice) as inspiration. The goal was to capture the joy, spontaneity and uniqueness of a Dead show, resulting in a dark, spacey and cerebral Cabernet Sauvignon that, with aeration, reveals layers of the various influences of the blend’s elements. For the finishing touch, Wines That Rock captured the timelessness of the Dead’s artwork by silk screening the wine bottle with an intricate version of “Bertha.””

    That is, no joke, a paragraph in the email announcement. This wine tastes like Eyes and Dark Star. WTF. If one glass doesn’t hit you like 500 mics, you get a full refund.

    I’d order a bottle but I bet it tastes awful. $40 basically for the bottle, dump the wine out.

    • They really said that ?

      Really ?

      Are we wine drinkers now ? Is that what has happened to us ?

      If wine drinking had any true believers then they must now feel how we felt when the Frat Boys discovered the cocaine and fun that we had at the shows and brought their Brothers in sunglasses and caps down for the party.

      Dear Wine Drinkers..
      We’re here

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