Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Besides: Suicide Is Painful

Suicide is like learning Italian: it seems like such a good idea, but I know deep down that I’ll never get around to it.


  1. Sending you good vibes and healing thoughts. Hope you’re well. My email is if you want someone to talk to.

  2. Someone here once mentioned that anything from 72 is a cure all.

    If you need something that one of us can get you just shout.

    Would a vacation to Lockn, or Dead and Company help.. or make things worse ? 😉

    If it would help and you need some miracle tickets, let me or us know, I am sure I am not alone in my desire to see you back on track.

    I blame the stones for this, they are a bunch of wife beating, fan clubbing, wife stealin, child marrying fucks who just happen to rock. To much thinking about them will turn you all Walrus or worse.

    Serious about helping to get you to a show.. if it would cheer you to stand up while eating, and use porta potties for a day or two, or if you want to see John Mayer ruin your favorite band.. let me know.

  3. Are you having trouble with your pyloric valve?

  4. Comes A Time to push away from the keyboard for a break and go visit a friend, or take a walk in nature. That always helps me recharge the empty batteries. Peace Out TotD.

  5. Be well Mr. TotD.

  6. More signal, less noise 🙂


    Bullets: Saved
    Powder: Dry
    Lamps: Trimmed & Burning

  8. When I can’t stop my heart from pounding, I always think: do I want to be remembered as the girl who killed herself? The girl who gave up?

    Certainly not. I’m far too important. I am as deserving of being here as everybody else. (Except for Donald Trump.)

    Me talk pretty (to myself) one day.

    • NoThoughtsOnDead

      September 7, 2015 at 2:22 pm

      I’ve been thinking a lot about “legacy” recently, with friends dying or encountering cancer, etc. Some of how people remember us is what we do, and some is not fully in our control. Some people can’t control their mood disorders, and so they might not “give up.”

      If you would see your choice as “giving up,” though, then I think you’re on the right track, Maggie. We’re each a unique flower (just like everyone else), and I believe there’s still enough oxygen to go around. I’ve never mastered the trick of “always talk pretty (to myself)” but my reality “got better” (e.g. made more sense for ME) as I moved from adolescence to young adulthood to what people have humorously labelled “maturity.” I credit my family for helping, and giving me space to flail and find my way; it sounds like you’ve got some of that support, too.

      I’m still impressed that Mr. TotD had such a sure sense in his homage to Parker — not an easy needle to thread!

      • Wow, beautifully put. I’ve got so much support at home and beyond that I know I’ll be okay. I might’ve mentioned this before, but I do in fact have an anxiety disorder among other things. I’m a very happy person but I have a hard time when the fog rolls in. But I do not make rash decisions; I know I’m meant to be here for a long time, so I’m living it out, even if some of it’s gonna be not as fun as the rest of it. I’d like to just feel normal again, y’know? (~);} Thanks for listening.

      • Mike & Gloria Gonna Be My Name

        September 7, 2015 at 5:17 pm

        I thought Parker/Resume too. Another brilliant wit….except she had, like, 100% less sentient sound system jokes.


    There’s a decent I Shall be Released from this show too. Jer singing with conviction at this show (JGB 11-9-91).

  10. Why is everyone so serious? I thought we were going to talk about carpets. Getting rid of this crap and putting in the wall to wall

  11. Suicide: Permanent solution to a temporary problem…

  12. Hey TotD. Just wanted you to know you bring a lot of smiles & laughs my way…all through the five inch screen of a phone. Here’s my attempt to send some positive mojo back your way. Be well, man!

  13. When you have so many problems you need a Paradise Valley truck to haul around your baggage.

  14. longtime reader, first time poster. just stopped in because I wanted to say that this blog brightens my day on a regular basis. thanks for that.

    • Mike & Gloria Gonna Be My Name

      September 7, 2015 at 5:23 pm

      For reals- we’re your Benji. We’re your Parish. We’re like how Weir says he was like the left hand of Mcoy Tyner to Jerry. Like that. Only with more dank memes.

  15. Listen TotD. Apparently you are going through a rough patch. I’m really sorry to hear about this, and about all your S/A, in LA, in the past. You should know I read this blog first before anything else, every day — love it; it makes me laugh at inappropriate times. You are doing something right. Keep it up. And if not, Pig tells ya to write your congressman.

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