Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Bobby, You Knew I Was A Lawyer When You Put Me On

Hey, Bobby. Whatcha doing?


Goddammit, Red Metal Stool. Why do you have to act this way?

“He’s NOTHING without me! I’M THE STAR, not him! Oates. He’s fucking Oates, and you treat him like Hall.”

Red Metal Stool, I think you’re getting delusions of necessity.

“I’m irreplaceable.”

You are one of the most replaceable things I’ve ever met. Any two-to-three-foot-tall sturdy object with a flat surface could do your job. Shit, an amplifier could just do double duty.

“This is the elitist attitude that got Trump elected.”

It’s not.

“You look down on the working man.”

You’re not a man. You’re a stool. Two stools, actually.

“That’s it. I’m getting my lawyer.”

You have a lawyer?

“Counselor, do I have a case?”

“Yesss. Thisss man hasss ssslandered you.”

Snake Tee-Shirt?

“Sssnake Tee-Shirt, Esssquire.”

When did you go to law school?

“Corresssssspondence classssss.”

Makes sense.

1 Comment

  1. Has anyone played one of these D’Addarios that Bob is promoting?

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