Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Build A Better Bonnie

Here’s a much better Bonnie than Prince Bonny Buddy or whatever the fuck his name was: Bonnie Tyler, who had a bunch of hits in the early 80’s and then faded from view in America, but still hit the charts in Europe thereafter.

Total Eclipse of the Heart is not some forgotten gem; it’s got 145 million views on YouTube, and is so familiar that it’s used as a jokey musical cue. But it’s a great and grandly silly song, written by the champion of the grandly silly song, Jim Steinman (the guy behind Bat Out Of Hell).

Most people point out the line about living in a powder keg and giving off sparks as the most brilliant, but I nominate “love is like a shadow on me all of the time.”If I met someone and asked them how they were doing, and they said, “Honestly? Love is like a shadow on me all of the time,” then I would marry that person.

It should also be noted that the record this song appeared on was called Faster than the Speed of Night. Swear to God.


  1. Luther Von Baconson

    April 28, 2016 at 11:37 am

    you’re so Hot Bonnie

    • Bonnie Franklin is so Dead Connected

      Bonnie=>One day at a time=>Mackenzie Phillips=>John Phillips=>Me and My Uncle

      Bonnie=>One Day at a time=>Valerie Bertinelli=>Van Halen=>Sammy Hagar

  2. Luther Von Baconson

    April 28, 2016 at 3:18 pm

    There are hills beyond Pentland and lands beyond Forth,
    Be there lords i’ the south, there are chiefs i’ the north!
    There are brave Duinnewassels, three thousand times three
    Will cry “Hey!” for the bonnets o’ bonnie Dundee

  3. My modern dance teacher in college was stuck in the 80s (I was not in college in the 80s, but rather, early 00s) and so we got to dance all the time to Bonnie Tyler and it was rad as fuck.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.