Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Corne77

We haven’t discussed the new box set–and the doings behind it–in detail yet. The first release from the newly-reacquired Betty Boards, May 1977: Get Shown The Light contains four full shows that you’ve almost certainly heard (and heard, and heard, and heard) before. The 5th, 7th, 8th, and 9th of May (New Haven, Boston, Ithaca, and Buffalo, respectively) of that magical and well-rehearsed year of 1977, shined up to a gleam and bursting with extras and bonus bullshit.

This is usually the place where I post the latest video from David Lemieuxsebitmysister, but he recorded this one inside a vacuum cleaner. I don’t know how he got the lake in there, but he accomplished it and all you can hear is wind.

Luckily, I found a piece of software that transcribes YouTube videos, and I can present to you his words here:

“Uh, hey, everybody. David Lemieux here, your old buddy Dave, and I’ve got some very exciting news. If you’re watching this you probably know that we’ll be releasing–”

[NOTE: At this point, a large duck steals Dave’s hat.]

“Hey! That’s mine!”

[NOTE: Dave chases the duck in and out of frame for two minutes and three seconds.]

“Okay, as I was saying: big news, folks. You probably remember that, after quite a bit of negotiation, we got the so-called “lost Betty Boards” back into the Vault where they belong. So what we thought would be a great way to commemorate the 40th–”

[NOTE: A small child, naked but for her toque, sprints towards the lake.]

“NO, GIRL GORDIE!”

[NOTE: Dave snares the child before she enters the water.]

“You know we can’t swim!”

[NOTE: Canadians cannot swim. Sink right to the bottom. They’re like bulldogs or chimps.]

“Go back and play with your mother Regina, and your siblings Gordie, Northstar, Jean-Luc, Fleece, and the twins, Mickie and Billie.”

[NOTE: As Girl Gordie begins to walk back to the igloo where the Lemieux family live, a duck steals her toque.]

“Darn it, not again.”

[NOTE: At this point, Dave and a small, naked child with no toque chase a duck in and out of frame for several minutes.]

There’s like twenty more minutes of that, if I’m honest.

There is also, as I mentioned, a bevy of bonus bullshit: a book, and an essay, and–in 5 of the 15,000 copies that will be shipped–a Tie-Dyed Ticket. The lucky recipients get to go to the Vault, meet DL, and be ironically murdered. Last one standing gets to be the new Dead archivist.

5 Comments

  1. Hapskip the happy berry.

    February 18, 2017 at 9:40 pm

    “What is Regina?”

    ‘Funniest evah line from mad men, tv thingy, by roger.

  2. Mean, Green, Devil Eating Machine

    February 19, 2017 at 1:33 pm

    May 6th, in Providence – that is THE show of this tour, maybe even of the year.

  3. Thomas Wilkinson

    February 19, 2017 at 8:56 pm

    That is some really funny material! DL makes me cringe everytime he talks on ‘this day in dead history’ about some shit show from ’84 or some other down year and says it’s a “really, really, great show”. Wtf! No Dave, it sucked. I don’t care if you were only 13 and you couldn’t go but your friends moron older borthers and friends went and you couldn’t wait to hear the ‘legendary’ mail it in, and let’s get out of here show. First Dead show something like ’89 and he’s got that gig?
    Thanks for that piece!!! Great stuff!
    Tom Wilkinson

    • Thoughts On The Dead

      February 19, 2017 at 8:57 pm

      Dave Lemieux is a FoTotD and is the best man or woman on the planet to be doing his job.

      • Thomas Wilkinson

        February 19, 2017 at 9:52 pm

        Ok I’ll take your word for it, thanks for the insight. Apparently you know him and can vouch for his credibility. I went to many of the shows that he airs on his program. Some truly magnificent from 70-74, and 77-78, including most of the Northeast Spring 77 shows, Cornell included, and in my opinion, terrible shows from some really dark days of the 80’s. Yet he plays them and states they are really really good. Well, it’s subjective so if he believes it, it’s true to him and I guess many others.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

*