Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Differences Between My Doctor’s Visit This Morning And Al Swearengen’s Medical Experience

  • Whores and cutthroats were not drafted into nursing duties.
  • In fact, there were neither whores nor cutthroats in the room at all.
  • Examination took place in a doctor’s office in a medical building rather than a saloon.
  • At no point was anyone called a cocksucker.
  • Physician had not been broken by events he witnessed in the Civil War.
  • Physician was not a “he” at all.
  • Doctor neither came to my residence, nor was I dragged via sled through the quagmire of shit that is the thoroughfare.
  • Not one lofty and well-written speech about the inevitability of death and the inviolability of the human spirit.
  • I was never in danger of being taken to the woods and left to die. (I hope.)
  • Thanks to Obamacare, I had a $1 co-pay for my visit, whereas Obamacare was not possible in Deadwood for so, so, so, so many reasons.
  • Received prescription for a topical ointment and an antibiotic, rather than a slug of dope forced down my throat.
  • Magazines in the waiting room were in color.

1 Comment

  1. Nobody 12-pointed Slippery Dan.

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