Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Doing His Civic Booty


Hey, Billy. Whatcha doing?

“Thoughts on my Ass! Still a lonely weirdo?”


“Great. Look at me, I’m a statesman.”

You’re not.

“Yeah, sure I am. Big statesman. Like Ben Franklin, or Will Rogers. Some dead white guy who told jokes and loved America.”

You registered to vote?

“Grateful Deads are automatically registered to vote.”

That’s not true at all.

“Sure. Jerry Brown snuck it in a bill a few years ago, made it retroactive.”


“Time Sheath.”


“Made everything much easier. None of us were what you’d call detail-oriented. Good thing we got it done, too, because I love voting.”


“Poll worker skank!”


“They’re so organized. And then when you’re done, they give you a sticker.”


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