• Brembo brake calipers, dark gold – $595.00  (“After the last bombing, no one congratulated me! Not one person! I said, ‘It’s Radical Islamic Muslims who planted the bomb.’ Within minutes, I said it. Other people said I should wait for confirmation. I knew. I knew. I knew. Then they catch the guy where? First American Fried Chicken? Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me? Is Black Lives Matter involved? You have to ask! Listen, you know I don’t have time to be politically correct, so I’ll just say it: the blacks love fried chicken, and the Muslims love terrorism. Now they’ve merged!”)
  • Cargo net – $60.00 (“Charity, business, what’s the difference? People gave to my charity because of me, which is like giving it to me. It’s amazing that we’re talking about this when the Clinton Foundation was the basis for SPECTRE. In the James Bond movies, the bad guys. I was asked to play James Bond, this is true. After Roger Moore, who was a very weak Bond, not a great Bond, and they called me up. I was in very good shape at the time–I’m still very handsome, but I was younger–and they wanted me to be the first American James Bond. I offered to do the British accent, because I do the best British accents. I can say cheerio, take the lift to your flat, whatever. We couldn’t make a deal, but I would have been the best James Bond.”)
  • Crystal White tricoat – $500.00 (“Hillary Clinton, who is on the brink of death, wants to let the entire world into your house. She has a plan–I’ve seen it, I’ve seen it–to force you to let refugees sleep in your children’s bedrooms. Bunk bed, trundle, whatever. And where are they from? Currently, this is true, currently we are not allowed to ask these people where they’re from. It is against the rules to ask an immigrant where he’s from! I’ve seen the form. Maybe this is why we don’t know where Obama is from, even though he was born in America like I’ve always said.”)
  • Recaro performance seats – $2,300.00 (“Performance isn’t great for the blacks. Very, very bad shape. Right now, the blacks are the worst off they’ve ever been in America. Men, women, children, all worse. The old ladies on the porch. Grannies, I think they call them, I guess, I don’t know. Poverty! Terrible poverty, no jobs, no money, can’t buy sneakers. Violence! Every black in Baltimore has been shot multiple times this year. Now, most of those blacks are shot by other blacks, but the few times a cop does it, you hear about it. Media is racist, not the facts.”)
  • Premium all-weather floormats – $140.00 (“We’re the floormats! Right now? It’s America, which is not great. China? Lots of winners over there. No winners here any more because Crooked Hillary has winners rounded up and put into FEMA camps. Why has President Obama never shown us proof that there are no FEMA camps? Is Obama, who has hatred in his heart, getting revenge for the Tuskegee Experiment by cutting white people open in secret FEMA camps? Many people say that, but I don’t talk about that any more. I’m about winning, which we need to do more of.”)
  • Luxury package – $2,075.00 (“The cops and law enforcement who caught that bomber, the fried chicken guy, you know. Great. Great cops, I love the cops. He shot at them! Now he gets taken to the hospital, fed. Maybe he’s going to radicalize the nurses? Never know. When I’m president, we’re going to look at that. I don’t think terrorists should get arrested, just buried.”)
  • Trim kit, Morello carbon fiber – $1,400.00 (“Imagine a bowl of Skittles. Now what if three Skittles were actually Radical Islamic Muslims? Would you eat that candy? Crooked Hillary, who masturbates to Jack the Ripper, wants you to eat Muslim candy. Twix bars leaving bombs in malls. It’ll happen! ISIS is in our candy, and our teenagers are looking up to them. They’re on the cyber, and we have to shut all that down. I can do it. There are problems, but I can make them go away.”)
  • 19″ wheels with forged polish finish alloy – $900.00 (“Hillary Clinton, who is a liar who cannot be trusted, personally started the rumor that Obama wasn’t born in America. I made the mistake of trusting her because I have a very good heart. Too trusting! The New York Times, which is disgraceful and should burn to the ground, will say that there are no tapes of Crooked Hillary asking for Obama’s birth certificate at speeches, but I’ve seen them. Times is a horrible rag, horrible. Maybe they should take all the fire alarms and sprinklers out of their building and see what happens. Who knows?”)