Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Donald Trump Responds To Record Store Day 2016 Exclusive Releases

  • Dizzy Gillespie, The Champ. (“Very big cheeks. Enormous. Even I don’t have cheeks like that, and I have very big cheeks. Squirrels have big cheeks, but they’re doing it with acorns. Dizzy did it with air. Sometimes you can’t find an acorn. Can always find air. Squirrels are losers.”)
  • Regina Spektor, Soviet Kitsch. (“Lot of people talk bad about Putin. They don’t realize how talented he is. Judo. Hunting. We would get along. Frankly, I would take him for some suits. Strong man. Weak suits. First summit we have, I’m buying him some suits. Have the tailor come to Trump Tower, he does the thing with the chalk. Maybe lunch. We have some of the best restaurants in the world in Trump Tower. Chinese. Italian. Food court.”
  • John Renborn, The Attic Tapes (“I’m moving the White House to Trump Tower. D.C. is not a great town. Plus, tower is better than a house. Taller. Way taller. Guy with a house takes the stairs like a dog. Guy with a tower rides the elevator. Maybe we can paint it white, I don’t know. That’s probably something for the First Lady, Melania, who is acknowledged as one of the great beauties.”)
  • Xiu Xiu Xiu Xiu Plays the Music of Twin Peaks. (“This is what I’ve been talking about! China steals everything! When I’m President, first thing, I slap a tariff on imports of Chinese musicians playing our TV show themes. Done. Boom. That’s how businessman deal with things, and I am a very successful businessman. We got politicians making our deals. Politicians can’t even do their own jobs. Lyin’ Ted is a politician. There you go.”)
  • James Bay, Chaos and the Calm. (“That’s easy. Calm is when the people are heard. People love Trump. They say to me ‘Mr. Trump, we love you.’ Smart people. That’s what makes America run: smart people. Love Trump. Got all the popular votes. Lyin’ Ted? Blow him away everywhere. Louisiana, New York, everywhere. Beat him very badly. I got the votes. Got the votes, you get the nomination. Calm. If the convention is unfair? Chaos. Rigged? Chaos. Let’s have calm.”)
  • Cheap Trick, At Budokan: The Complete Concert. (“Done a lot of business with the Japanese. Very shrewd. I usually come away pretty good, but they’re very shrewd. The bowing is nice. Shaking hands is dumb. Germs. Filthy. People go to the bathroom and they don’t wash their hands. I’m the best at washing my hands after going to the bathroom. People have complimented me on it, and they’re right. Why isn’t that in the media. Trump said this, Trump said that. Nothing about washing my hands.”)
  • Madonna, Like A Virgin & Other Hits (“Banged her. ’85? ’86? Banged her. Very fit, always at the gym. A very powerful woman, but not in bed. Enjoyed being taken. Then she started dating black guys. I broke it off.”)
  • Third Power, Believe. (“No one talks about military action against China, and I think it shouldn’t be off the table. How are you going to negotiate? Obama says right up front, “We’re not going to drop a nuke on China.” He says that! Now they know! That’s not how I negotiate. Maybe I will drop a nuke on China. Dropped a nuke on Japan and now they’re our friends. Maybe that’s how you do it. China doesn’t respect us. They should. They should.”)
  • Oscar Peterson, Tenderly. (“Rex Ryan is a good friend of mine. Foot man. Loves toes. Great coach. If I had bought the Bills, we would have some rings by now. He’s stuck with losers for owners. NFL screwed up big time. Many owners are good friends of mine, but they really screwed up. Daniel Snyder, Redskins owner: good friend of mine. Very wealthy man. Good friend.”)

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