Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Donald Trump Responds To The Lineup From Woodstock

  • Canned Heat. (“You wanna see heat? Get in my way. Try to pull some crap at the convention. Maybe the building will burn down. Maybe. That would be terrible. Awful. Horrible. Might happen. Don’t want it to. When I pray, I pray that won’t happen, and I pray every night. Great at praying. Love God. Jesus. The best. Building might burn down.”)
  • Country Joe and the Fish. (“Many fish are strong. Powerful fish. Sailfish is out-of-this-world. That’s a champion fish. Wouldn’t think so, because sailboats are not powerful. Yacht is powerful. But a sailfish has brains. Good fish.”)
  • The Band (“Robbie Robertson is a good friend of mine. A talent. The other guys were lucky. Gotta be honest.”)
  • Ravi Shankar. (” I can do downward dog. Warrior pose. I can do the best yoga. I have a great relationship with the Indians, and they all say that I can do the best yoga. Lotus. I could do a handstand right now, but I’m not going to.”)
  • Jefferson Airplane (“I have the best airplane. Better than Obama’s. That’s not his plane. Did he steal it? I paid for mine. Better than Air Force One: everything’s gold. Seatbelts are gold. Air sickness bags have my logo on it. Classiest auto-pilot in the world. Best plane.”)
  • Santana (“Is he a protester? Bernie paid him ten dollars to take the night off from not having a job? Used to be if you saw a bunch of Mexicans, you would build Dodger Stadium on top of them. Do it now and they call you a racist. They’re the racists.”)
  • Johnny Winter. (“He is very albino, but not as albino as me. Many people have told me that I’m the most albino man they’ve ever met. I am very albino.”)
  • Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young. (“Stephen Stills has been a guest of mine at Mar-A-Lago many times. Cheats at golf, but I still beat him. Tall, but not as tall as me.”)
  • Tim Hardin. (“China’s laughing at us. Laughing. They’re building and making and what are we doing? Black lives matter? How about dollars, do dollars matter? Because the Chinese don’t care about the lives of the blacks. The blacks are much better off with me than with the Chinese.”)
  • The Who. “(I own maybe four or five of the world’s best swimming pools. Dubai, some other Arab places: they think they got good swimming pools. Nothing compared to mine. Olympic-sized infinity pools. Guy said it couldn’t be done. I said ‘Which one of us is Donald Trump?’ He said, “You are, Mr. Trump.’ I said, ‘ So build my pools.’ I got my pools. No one’s got pools like mine.”)
  • Joan Baez. (“My favorite singer.”)

6 Comments

  1. Nothing about Bert Sommer, Sweetwater or The Keef Hartley Band?

    • Thoughts On The Dead

      March 20, 2016 at 1:23 am

      Keef almost made it.

      Sweetwater is made up. They were the band from Almost Famous.

      • No, Sweetwater was a real band from LA (I figure you may know this).

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sweetwater_(band)

        I think Almost Famous namechecked them for that reason. The first band to perform at Woodstock (after Richie Havens, a solo act), and they were lost to history because the lead singer was in a terrible car accident a few months later.

        Almost Famous is full of those things–Kate Hudson is tossed off to Humble Pie at the end, as I recall, and Peter Frampton was an adviser, so that was an inside joke too.

  2. Luther Von Baconson

    March 20, 2016 at 3:07 am

    • My dear mom did not approve of this album…

    • Woodstock was Harvey Mandel’s third of forth gig with Canned Heat. Lead guitarist Henry Vestine had quit in a huff one night at Fillmore West in early August. Mike Bloomfield filled in for the first set, and Harvey for the second set. Harvey was asked to stay and go East with them, and he said yes. A few weeks later he was onstage at Woodstock.

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