Hey, John Mayer. You should’ve taken your Shrinky-Dink out of the oven sooner. I think you burned it.
“This is Tom Jones.”
No, boring novels are shaped differently.
“The one and only.”
Wow, cool. Hey, John?
“Shut the fuck up, please.”
“I’m not asking to see his dick.”
ASK TO SEE HIS DICK.
It’s not gay.
“That’s not why I won’t do it. We’re at a bar.”
People take their dicks out in bars all the time.
“Not gonna happen.”
Follow him into the bathroom.
“This is why no one talks to you.”
Take a Snapchat with Tom Jones’ dick, John Mayer.
“Do you want to talk about y shirt, or do you want to talk about Tom Jones’ dick?”
The second thing.