Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

iPado, iPadas, iPadat, iPadamus, iPadatis, iPadant

You’re more iPad than man now, Bobby.

“Technology is just incredible. Couldn’t live without these suckers.”

What do they do?

“One on the left is for social media.”




“And, uh, the one on the right is for gaming.”

Oh, no.

“Yeah, I’m a gamer now.”

Don’t be a gamer, Bobby. Be anything but a gamer.

“Too late. All in. I’ve, uh sent a number of death threats to Nintendo this morning.”


“I told you: I’m a gamer now.”

Awesome. How do you feel about not being named 2017’s Sexiest Man Alive?

“Better than not being named 2017’s Sexiest Dead Guy.”

I admire your sanguine outlook.

“Uh-huh. I never quite got a handle on what that word means.”

Me, either. I was hoping you wouldn’t call attention to it.



  1. Latin joke. I get it.

  2. Maybe he should use one of them for lyrics, like when he calls an audible but can’t get Me and My Uncle right, or the awe fuck it on Werewolves. Makes for a good laugh when he forgets. Wish Jerry had had that technology.

  3. Speaking of which. I attended 2/26/90 in Oakland. Check out hell in a bucket – submitted for consideration in worst/best bobby-lyric-botch-job-evar.

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