Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

It’s Not Brain Surgery

On Meet The Press this morning, there was this from Dr. Ben Carson:

…the retired neurosurgeon said, “I would not advocate that we put a Muslim in charge of this nation. I absolutely would not agree with that.”

Other people who should not be put in charge of America, according to Ben Carson:

  • Atheist.
  • Communist.
  • Contortionist, metaphorical or actual.
  • Foreigner.
  • Someone who doesn’t love America the way she wants to be loved.
  • Slowly.
  • Gently.
  • But: firmly.
  • An unmarried person.
  • Hindu.
  • Jain.
  • Zoroastrian.
  • Druid.
  • Pagan.
  • Wiccan.
  • Wrong kind of Jew.
  • Like, one of those guys who’s never been out of Brooklyn, yet has a foreign accent?
  • Let’s just set the yarmulke as the over/under: if you wear it all the time, you can’t be President.
  • Wrong kind of Christian.
  • Obviously, Unitarians can go fuck themselves.
  • Any of those Orthodox churches.
  • As far as I–Ben Carson, world-renowned brain surgeon–am willing to say on television for some reason, Greek Orthodox or whatever may as well be Muslim, and I do not advocate allowing another Muslim to be President.
  • I meant a Muslim.
  • America has never had a Muslim President.
  • I’ve been told.
  • I also would not advocate letting a lady be in charge.

1 Comment

  1. Unitarians…aren’t they the ones who begin their prayers, “To whom it may concern?”

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