Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Menu New Minglewood Blues

This has been floating around the internet for the past few days, and so I present it to you: Ladies and gentlemen, the least interesting Dead & Company document in existence. This is some boring-ass white person food. If this menu were a vacation, it would be a week in a Delaware laundromat.

Assorted notes:

  • If Bobby sees a fish, Bobby eats the fish; that’s why he’s not allowed in aquariums.
  • John Mayer’s meal is what they give you after surgery; it’s food to contemplate suicide by.
  • Are abs worth that?
  • I don’t know if abs are worth that.
  • They probably are, though.
  • The Grateful Dead hates blue fin.
  • Mickey out of nowhere with the pulled pork.
  • Was he thinking, ‘What’s the most pain-in-the-ass food there is?’ and came up with the bullshit you have to cook for nine hours?
  • Or did Mickey think the phrase “pulled pork” was funny?
  • The second thing, right?
  • What if you brought Mickey unpulled pork?
  • Would Mickey pull his own pork?
  • Does Billy ever pull his pork, by which I mean masturbate in front of strangers?
  • Um.
  • Uhhhh…
  • Do…
  • Do Oteil and Jeff Chimenti not get fed?
  • What the fuck?
  • That’s not cool, Dead & Company.
  • Do they have to hit the Burger King drive-through on the way in to the venue?
  • What if they’re running late, and don’t have time; would Mickey share his pulled pork with them?
  • This is bullshit, Dead & Company.


  1. A second page surfaced with the same healthy, unobtrusive bullshit for Jeff and Oteil. Now days, rock stars need bag men for their sugar.

  2. Rock and roll!

  3. Luther Von Baconson

    November 29, 2017 at 11:37 am

    Dead & the Company of My Grandmother

    “just some tepid water & toast please…… you have Peek Freans?”

  4. Mean, Green, Devil Eating Machine

    November 29, 2017 at 4:34 pm

    Those guys are picky eaters. 🙂 I just get the leftovers, which are A-Ok with me!

    • Mean, Green, Devil Eating Machine

      November 29, 2017 at 4:40 pm

      Since you are so good about being TOTD, here is the list for the other two guys:

      • Luther Von Baconson

        November 30, 2017 at 3:31 pm

        “the precious essence that I recognized again when, all night long following a dinner at which I had eaten, they played, in farces as crude and poetic as a fairy play by Shakespeare, at changing my chamber pot into a jar of perfume.”

        Jeff/Oteil’s Way

  5. what do you call the old dude floating in the aquarium eating fish?
    otter bob.

  6. Luther Von Baconson

    November 30, 2017 at 11:28 am

    some Rotten Eggs maybe? sorry just found this gem from the vault.

  7. Sushi, Sashima, wild-caught salmon, nothing fried ever …

    To Waffle House..

    Hah.. got to love it.

    • Mean, Green, Devil Eating Machine

      November 30, 2017 at 4:09 pm

      Things like that happen on tour. You do have to eat, every once in a while, and when the opportunity is there, you take it.

  8. Luther Von Baconson

    December 5, 2017 at 3:52 pm

    about the Spicy Rare Salmontrout. JB is JPB right? Spicy Rare Salmontrout Consultant Extraordinaire, Esq.

    • Luther Von Baconson

      December 5, 2017 at 4:01 pm

      “quit callin’ me about the Effen Salmontrout. I already sent all the Papa John Pepperflake packets I got”

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