Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Mexican, Wood

You look healthy.

“Fuck off, man. I don’t need your nonsense today.”

What happened today?

“Ah, you know: usual bullshit. Plus, I killed Natalie Wood.”

I always suspected Billy.

“He’d be the obvious choice, yeah. But, no: I did it. It was an accident and all, but still.”

What happened?

“Well, me and Bobby and Chris–”

Robert Wagner and Christopher Walken.

“–had a real tense D&D game going below decks. And, man, she just wouldn’t quit with the yakking. Made me blow my initiative roll.”

What character were you playing?



“So we got annoyed and kinda maybe threw her overboard. As a joke.”

Not funny.

“It would have been had we been in a pool. Or maybe a smallish lake. But, you know: it was the middle of the night and she was shitfaced and we were ten miles offshore.”

Right. Like I said: not funny.

“Hindsight is 20/20.”

It is. You gonna be in any trouble?

“Nah. Hal Kant called a guy.”


“Sidney Korshak.”

You’re not gonna be in any trouble.

“Good to know important people.”

Not for Natalie.

1 Comment

  1. Luther Von Baconson

    February 2, 2018 at 12:59 pm


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