Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

News Sources That Are Not Enemies Of The American People

  • InfoWars.
  • Alex Jones.
  • Breitbart.
  • Fox, mostly but not always.
  • Guy at the end of the bar in sweatpants and an ankle monitor.
  • Innards of a chicken, if indeed they are arranged in a propitious manner.
  • President Trump, unless he is being sarcastic or didn’t mean it. (The president retains the right to retroactively declare he was being sarcastic or didn’t mean it.)
  • Wikileaks.
  • Reddit.
  • Overheard conversations at the gas station.
  • Secret messages hidden in the word jumble on the back of a box of Crunch Berries.
  • Steven Miller looming over you while you sleep, whispering the good news of America’s transmorphosis to the exalted realms; effervescent shall we be, effervescent shall we be.
  • Lenny Dykstra’s Twitter feed.
  • Neighbor’s dog.
  • 4chan.
  • Ouija board.
  • Facebook.
  • If you see a red, white, and blue parrot, trust that parrot.


  1. So glad to See Patti Labelle make an appearance here.

  2. Ouija board are the BEST for obtaining the lowdown.

    Ouija & LSD!

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