Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Occasions Upon Which You May Grab A Woman By The Pussy

  • If a women says to you, “Please come here and grab me by the pussy,” then you may grab that woman by the pussy.
  • Opposite Day.
  • You’re more important than she is, and nobody’s going to believe her, anyway.
  • If a woman is falling off a roof, or a bridge, and the only way to save her is to grab her by the pussy, then pussy-grabbing may be done.
  • Similarly, if a woman is about to walk int traffic, and you are a dwarf who cannot reach her shoulders, then perhaps you may grab the woman’s pussy.
  • I think there are a couple two-person yoga poses that require pussy-grabbing, but that really falls under the auspices of the first bullet point: that grabbifying of pudenda was planned out and consented to by both parties.
  • Sometimes women start thinking they’re humans, worthy of respect; grabbing ’em real hard right on their puss straightens that women’s lib shit right out.
  • You bought her furniture, and she still won’t fuck you even though you bought her furniture. Fuckin’ bitch.

3 Comments

  1. That last one made my blood run cold.

  2. Janes Addiction was right. Nothing’s shocking (anymore).

  3. donald trump, the short-fingered vulgarian, makes me sick to my pussy.

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