Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

On “Nixonian”

Nixon served his country in the Navy, and later in the Naval Reserves.
Trump dodged the draft.

Nixon was elected to the House of Representatives and the Senate, both times from his home state of California.
Trump has never held office, and his home state despises him.

Nixon was an accomplished and cunning lawyer.
Trump thinks he can “open up the libel laws.”

Nixon was the Vice-President of the United States; one time in Caracas, he was assaulted by a mob and his car stoned.
Trump didn’t go to the Press Correspondent’s Dinner because he can’t take jokes.

Nixon opened up China.
Trump picked a fight with Canada.

Nixon founded the EPA and OSHA, and signed the Clean Air Act.
Trump appointed a man who had sued the EPA 15 times to head it.

Nixon supported the Equal Rights Amendment and appointed more women to important positions than the “liberal” LBJ had.
Trump has two female cabinet secretaries: one of whom bought her job, and the other of whom is married to Mitch McConnell.

Nixon defeated George McGovern in the biggest electoral landslide in the nation’s history (at the time).
Trump lost the popular vote.

Nixon negotiated the Strategic Arms Limitations Treaty (SALT 1) and the Anti-Ballistic Missile treaty (ABM) with the Russians.
Trump let the Russians buy him underage hookers.

Nixon had a dog, Checkers, and he loved that little dog and he kept it.
Trump is incapable of love and has never had a pet.

Find a better adjective.

5 Comments

  1. occiddentalpoppy

    As always, you da man.

  2. SmokingLeather

    When it became clear that he was going to be removed from office Nixon stepped down (in his own words) to protect the country that he loved. Not so much from trump.

  3. whatswiththeduckbob

    Nailed it.

  4. Tor Haxson

    I am so confused,

  5. Jerseyjim

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vortex_I

    Note: Another feather in Nixon’s cap…when is Vortex 2?

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