Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

On The Limits Of Tolerance

Are all viewpoints acceptable?

To believe? Yes. You can believe whatever you want.

What about to espouse?

No. A community, city, society has the right to define the acceptable parameters of public discourse.

So some viewpoints are unacceptable?

The practice of said viewpoints. Feel free to believe you’re a dracula. Swoop around in a cape all day–

All night.

Yeah, I guess that guy would swoop around at night. Anyway: you can think yourself possessed by the Curse of the Whampyr all you want, but when you start breaking into virgins’ bedrooms and chomping on necks, then the authorities need to become involved.

You’re a typical liberal fascist Nazi thug.

I’m not typical.

So much for the tolerant left.

Ah. Can I ask you what you do for a living?

I’m a chef.

How lucky for me, as I have an elaborate metaphor that requires you be one.

What a coincidence.

Bigly. Now, what kind of food do you cook?

Oh, I cook it all. Tex. Mex. Steak. Cake. Whatever, man, I actually pride myself on using every ingredient I can find. I search for different flavors and textures all over the world, and I’ll try just about anything.


Anything! Common food, or really exotic stuff. It’s all welcome in my pot!


Hell, yeah.

Sheep face?


The spiciest chili pepper in the world?

Bring it on!



Bleach. The liquid with the bleaching properties.

I know what bleach is, and if I didn’t, your definition wouldn’t have helped at all.

I’m not helpful. Bleach?

Of course I wouldn’t cook with bleach.

Just a little bit.

None at all. Just a little bit would ruin all the food.

A shit-stained pillowcase from a sex club for couples in Harrisburg, PA.

Wow, no.

I thought you said everything was welcome in your pot.

These things are not food. Putting them in the pot would destroy everything.

You’re right. Sorry. What about White Supremacy?

That’s a concept.

More of an ethos.

What’s the difference?

A concept is an idea at the beginning of its life. White Supremacy has been well and truly thought out. You might even call it a viewpoint.

I see what you’re doing, but the fact remains that you can’t put an abstraction into a cooking pot.

If you could, though. Like, if you were making some bibambap.

Love that ‘bap.

Just about everything on the planet gets thrown in there. If you could, would you add White Supremacy?

I would not.

People are free to believe whatever they want, and society is free to disallow its pot from being poisoned.

Good thing I was a chef.

It really worked out perfectly.


  1. Tuesday Jackson

    March 24, 2017 at 11:58 am

    A thrillingly contestable post which launched a sprightly debate among men in suits at Shapiro’s Delicatessen, at an hour when the Jersey Shore moves in quest of lunch; inspiring a photo-phobic Grateful Dead epicurean joy-camp ethos.

    The Benzedrine Bisque is a local delicacy.

    Joy to the world & tasty bananas!

  2. Luther Von Baconson

    March 24, 2017 at 3:07 pm

    The Steak ‘n’ Cake™

  3. SmokingLeather

    March 25, 2017 at 3:12 am

    I found this on a local telephone pole.

    • Thoughts On The Dead

      March 25, 2017 at 3:18 am


      At least the Nazis were cool, y’know? The uniforms, the logo. They had a design-sense.

      These guys are just embarrassing.

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