“Who is Salt Bae?”
“Salt Bae. He’s a meme. And what the hell’s a meme? Who is Salt Bae, and what’s a meme? Answer my questions.”
Are you looking at Buzzfeed again?
“I like taking the quizzes. Do you know they can tell what Marvel hero I have a crush on from my pastry choices?”
Yeah, the material’s getting thinner and thinner over there.
“I chose a bear claw, so apparently I have a crush on Hawkeye.
“Right? No one has a crush on Hawkeye.”
No one sane. Why didn’t you go to Sundance to see the movie premiere?
“No ‘and.’ I don’t want to go anywhere too cold any more, and I’m just not going to.”
I respect that.
“I don’t give a shit.”
I respect that, too.