Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Random And Out-Of-Context Quotes From The President’s Secret Oval Office Tapes

  • “This clicker is shit. Why can’t I get a good clicker?”
  • “Ryan a queer? Looks like, could be, maybe. Top. I think top, but still: queer.”
  • “The Irish can’t drink. What you always have to remember with the Irish is they get mean. Virtually every Irish I’ve known gets mean when he drinks.”
  • “Why is there a bush outside chewing gum?”
  • “What’s the area code for Moscow?”
  • “Dill pickle is no good. Bad pickle. Half-sour is the king of pickles, best pickle.”
  • “I don’t want any Jew at that dinner who didn’t support us in that campaign. Is that clear? No Jew who did not support us.”
  • “More fuckable: Kimberly Guilfoyle or Mika However-You-Pronounce-It? Mike, what do you think? Who’s more fuckable? Who would you fuck, Mike? Tell everyone. Stop crying, baby. No, you can’t leave, Mike. You’re here with us.”
  • “This clicker doesn’t work, either. Rhonda! Rhonda! Get me a clicker that works and a Diet Coke!”
  • “Ahh, but the strawberries that’s… that’s where I had them. They laughed at me and made jokes but I proved beyond the shadow of a doubt and with… geometric logic… that a duplicate key to the wardroom icebox DID exist, and I’d have produced that key if they hadn’t of pulled the Caine out of action. I, I, I know now they were only trying to protect some fellow officers… “
  • “Who is this? Huckabee’s kid? Jesus, a whole family of sows. Look at those arms! Tell Girl Huck to wear long sleeves!”
  • “Let me say something before we get off the gay thing. I don’t want my views misunderstood. I am the most tolerant person on that of anybody in this shop. They have a problem. They’re born that way. You know that. That’s all. I think they are. Anyway, my point is, though, when I say they’re born that way, the tendency is there. But my point is that Boy Scout leaders, YMCA leaders, and others bring them in that direction, and teachers. And if you look over the history of societies, you will find, of course, that some of the highly intelligent people–Oscar Wilde, Aristotle, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera–were all homosexuals. Nero, of course, was, in a public way, in with a boy in Rome.”

1 Comment

  1. Luther Von Baconson

    May 15, 2017 at 11:29 am

    grudgingly I would have to concur with Orange Julius

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