Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Rejected Alternate Titles For Prince’s Song “Wonderful Ass”

  • DAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaamn: Booty.
  • Splendid Rump.
  • Fantastic Tushee.
  • Exemplary ‘Tocks.
  • A Backside Most Energizing And Callipygian, Stout In Presentation, and Warm In Winter, Which, By The Grace Of The Lord, Has Blessed My Face With Its Sitting. (Prince had been reading a lot of 19th-century American literature at the time.)
  • Bodacious Dumper.
  • Peachy-Keen Poop-Machine.
  • Your Ass Is The Windshield, And I’m Montgomery Clift. (Prince didn’t tell anyone about that one, and threw away the piece of paper he had written it down on.)
  • I Wanna Mow The Grass In Your Backyard With My Penis. (Also weird, sure.)
  • Jesus Is The Son Of God, But Your Ass Is The Moon. (Prince had been up for a while at this point and was maybe getting a bit punchy.)


  1. Luther Von Baconson

    April 29, 2016 at 5:16 pm

    “am I to be stared at?”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.