Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Roll Away

All I wanted were your artistic interpretations of Veneta. Drawings of Ken Babbs telling everyone they were about to be sprayed with shitwater. Watercolors of Billy’s posture. A novelization of the Dark Star. Whatever: I just thought it was something we could do together.

If you’ll recall, I made one for you, seen here:

veneta art jerry dong paintI received nothing in return. Were you intimidated by my artistic skills? I mean, you can’t even see the brush strokes.

No matter: intent is nothing. I got no art.

Wait.

THE TRUTH HAS WAITED LONG ENOUGH.

It’s been, like, two days.

That’s two generations to a fruit fly.

No one sent you crude drawings of a concert from 43 years ago, so you loosed a barrage of Rolling Stones-based shaky premises, links, and blatant homoeroticism at them?

What possible other option was there?

I didn’t think of it that way.

One does what one must.

Right. So: the nigh-on-infinite parade of virtually-identical concerts and bottomless well of pictures of coked-up limeys?

Yes.

You know I love the Stones, right?

Yes, I do.

Bro?

Bro?

Two Thousand Light From Brome?

Sure?

Ebrotional Rescue?

Uh-huh?

The Stones are about their albums.

They are, yeah.

There’s nothing deeper than Mick and Keith and Charlie playing the songs the way they’re supposed to go, but a little faster.

Nope.

Just find the best show from ’72 and the best one from ’78 and listen to those. All the other shows are exactly the same, but not as good.

It turns out that this is the case, yes.

What about the art?

Oh, Swaggie Maggie sent me this:

IMG_2030

The dog eating the baby’s food?

It’s good, isn’t it?

No.

You knew what it was.

That is not the metric by which art is measured.

I don’t know, man: I like it when stuff looks like the stuff that it is.

You’re a moderd-day Robert Hughes.

I have no idea who that is. Anyway: Maggie solved the puzzle and said the magic words and clicked her ruby Tuesdays and that’s it: GARCIA AND THE PALO ALTO PLAYMAKERS, MOTHERFUCKER.

Whatcha got in the tape deck?

Can’t go wrong with ’73

Chileans would disagree with that statement.

Fuck ’em.

Yeah. Yeah, y’know what: God Bless the Grateful Dead and God Damn Chile, May The Entire Country Get Ass-Measles.

Everything’s back to normal.

YAAAAY.

19 Comments

  1. maggiemay

    You can all thank me later. This has been a weird two days.

    Bow down, peasants.
    (I was actually planning on making artwork on Thursday, but I of course forgot. I move from thing-to-thing quickly.) 🙂

  2. tor_haxson

    Hey…

    Wait.. I am training my cats to sit in a tire and allow food to be taken by a dog..

    Really I am.

    I do think your art intimidated us somewhat.


    Tom

  3. spencer

    C:UsersUserLinksUntitled__.jpg

    • spencer

      let me try that again

      • tor_haxson

        Did you get this to us? Post it to twitter, then link it here?

  4. Robin Russell

    Mags chose to depict the only two entities in the entire movie that were not dosed to the eyeballs.

  5. Sir Luther Von Baconson

    can you give me an extension? for the assignment, not my penis. got a new SpaceComputer, hashing things out.

  6. Sir Luther Von Baconson

    Im Brodeo

    • Sir Luther Von Baconson

      shitters

  7. Sir Luther Von Baconson

    blob:https://sketch.io/22e4031c-299e-4de4-9f29-920aa0fa2d86

  8. Sir Luther Von Baconson

    frikken panda

  9. Sir Luther Von Baconson

    https://sketch.io/render/sketch55e3285c0ffeb.pn…

    • Sir Luther Von Baconson

      ok ok down the frikken wormhole i go

      https://twitter.com/Luther_Baconson/status/638024348390039553

      • tor_haxson

        That is sweet.

        You are in two wormholes, You are on the tweeters now..

        If it causes no offense to ToTD I think these should be as comments to the Veneta post as well, as if we can organize anything, at least we can try to be less like the Lees.

        Not sure how you follow the ToTD blogs, but he tweets when he posts, so following him on tweeters is one way.

      • tor_haxson

        Maybe ToTD will CURATE these later 😉

  10. dj5000000

    No more Stones ? Too bad. That was some good shit. Maybe you should publish a parallel blog with a parallel Stones universe.

Leave a Reply to Sir Luther Von Baconson Cancel reply