Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Ryan Adams’ Next Career Moves

  • Track-by-track cover of Katy Perry’s last album, which Pitchfork gives a 9.3.
  • Note-for-note cover of Yummy Yummy Yummy by the 1910 Fruitgum Company Ohio Express, which merits five interviews in Grantland.
  • Copies out the April ’12 issue of Spin longhand; Spin reprints it in its entirety.
  • Finally gives in and covers Summer of ’69, but with an acoustic guitar!
  • He really makes the song his own!
  • And by “his own,” I mean it sounds like something Paul Westerberg left off one of his later solo albums.
  • Has his good buddy Ed Sheeran over to the house, breaks out the acoustic guitars, and goes utterly HOUSE on an ASAP Rocky track.
  • Nicki Minaj cover, but Ryan changes all the pronouns so now the song is about a guy who only blows cocaine dealers: Rolling Stone gives it 5 stars.
  • Shot-by-shot remake of the Bad Blood video, except Ryan Adams can’t get stars to do cameos, so he plays all the parts; Sasha Frere-Jones writes a ten-thousand word article about how everything he knew was wrong up until the moment he saw this video.
  • Cuts out the middle-man and just covers the last decade of McDonald’s jingles; the New York Times calls it “a masterpiece” and then denies ever employing Judith Miller.

24 Comments

  1. Yummy Yummy Yummy actually done first by The Ohio Express if memory serves me correctly, which at this stage of the game is nothing to bank on.

  2. Hey TOD aka Curmudgeon! !
    Ryan has already covered Summer of 69 multiple times live.
    What planet do you live on ?
    🙂

  3. Ummmmm it’s A$AP Rocky get w/the times GRANDPA

  4. ToTD…

    Just because your job or something forces you to keep up with what has happened musically in the last 2 decades.. that does not mean you have to drag us along.

    Just Kidding of course, your good stuff is so very good, that you can write whatever you want and I will keep coming back.

    But just sayin that there is nothing I want to learn about Ryan or Taylor.

  5. Guys, I cannot answer questions regarding modern musicians. TotD knows more about Taylor Swift and the like than I do.

    I don’t know who “Fetty Wap” is; I don’t know what “Miley, what’s good?” means; and I will never, ever wrap my head around what the hell is going on between Drake and this Meek Mill guy. I pay attention to very little.

    You can always consult me for meme advice, however.

    😉

  6. Dear John is the closest thing to Black Peter that’s been written in my lifetime.
    One of the best songs in the last 20yrs imo.

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