Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

S2, E5 In Real-Time And Without Context

  • If you are a woman and you vomit onscreen, you are pregnant.
  • I haven’t mentioned the cinematography yet, but it’s glorious: scenes build up to exquisitely staged shots like this one:
  • gleet aftermath
  • That’s from the previous episode right after Al passed the gleet, but it’s just an example.
  • Don’t get all point-stuff-outy.
  • Al has been conscious for 30 seconds and people start bothering him.
  • Sanderson’s soliloquies: loser’s prayers.
  • Brilliant line #1: “I have great respect for the Fourth Estate. Here’s a statement to be printed.”
  • Richardson makes a run at Alma Garrett, but she swipes left.
  • Can’t blame a guy for trying.
  • Antlers.
  • How is it that Deadwood does not burn to the ground nine times a day?
  • I know it burns down eventually, in the unfilmed Season 4 and in real life, but it should have happened every single day.
  • Nine times.
  • I’ll just pretend I know nothing about Jeffrey Jones and enjoy my Western, thank you.
  • Old-timey abortions!
  • Brilliant line #2: Trixie refers to her studies in accountancy as “Jewish lessons.”
  • Deadwood kind of passes the Bechdel Test: there are many scenes with two women, and they are not talking about relationships or men.
  • They are almost always discussing the trouble created by men, though.
  • Although: what else were they going to talk about, baseball?
  • Ah, fuck: it’s Sarah Paulson.
  • Women are not to be trusted in Deadwood.
  • Men, either.
  • But women, also.
  • Goddammit, it’s the N****r General.
  • I’m gonna call him NG for the rest of whatever the fuck this is.
  • He is returned to Deadwood from San Francisco with a horse from the livery, which is run by Hostetler, the only other black character so far.
  • San Francisco to Deadwood is 1300 miles.
  • On a horse.
  • Holy shit, I could not live in the past.
  • I couldn’t travel in the past, at least.
  • I would stay where I was.
  • Powers Boothe is just fucking evil.
  • There is no railroad that goes to Deadwood, but if there were, Powers Boothe would have been tying women to the tracks left and right.
  • Besides Trixie and Joanie, all the whores with speaking roles deliver their lines in a robotic monotone; if one had done it, I would have assumed a bad actress, but they all do it, which seems like narrative choice.
  • You’re going to die, Isabella Miko, but you are so hot.
  • Brilliant line #3: Calamity Jane’s opinion of Custer is that he “could have saved a lot of lives by drinking more and being less ambitious.”
  • That’s good advice across the board, really.
  • Doc Cochran should not be a pediatrician.
  • I know kids were tougher back then, but Doc Cochran looks like this:
  • wormtongue-4
  • That’s going to scare a child, no matter the era.
  • Season 2 has way more smoking than Season 1, and it may reflect the gathering wealth of the town, or they may have just forgotten to hand actors cigars in the first season.
  • The town of Deadwood is powered by belligerence.
  • Everyone’s first choice is start bellowing obscenities at a problem.
  • Next time you meet a Libertarian, show them Deadwood.
  • This is what a Libertarian society looks like.
  • Brilliant line #4: Al Swearengen thinks Yankton is “too busy stealing to study human nature.”
  • Brilliant line #5: “You cannot fuck the future; the future fucks you.”
  • That may be overarching lesson of Deadwood.
  • The show is often praised for its authenticity, but like in every silly shoot-em-up, pistols can be discharged indoors right next to peoples’ heads with no damage to anyone’s ears.
  • Please stop saying that word, Calamity Jane.
  • In the past, murdering a black guy that hadn’t done anything was a viable distraction.
  • This is because the past was terrible.
  • Hey, it’s Charlie Utter!
  • I can’t wait until you get kicked in the head by a horse, Steve, you cocksucker.
  • John Hawkes, the actor who plays Sol Star, is not DJ Qualls.
  • You can get opium or whiskey or anything else in Deadwood, but there is apparently no weed.
  • Fuck that shit, man.
  • Wolcott (who is played by Garrett Dillahunt) reads the last letter Wild Bill Hickock wrote before being shot by the Coward, Jack McCall (who was also played by Garrett Dillahunt).
  • Freaky, man.
  • Let’s not talk about Wolcott’s fake beard, though.
  • Hearst comin’!
  • I will pay good money for everyone to stop saying that word, or at least stop saying it so casually.


  1. Fellow comment section enthusiasts,

    How many seasons of DeadWood?

    How are you all deciding to handle his DeadWood Binge?

    Maybe I will make an ad for Wally or something, or nap.

    If there are many seasons, maybe I just need to get on board.

    • There are three seasons. Get on board. There are Thoughts, there is Dead, and so on. I promise not to tell you how it ends

      I assume Justified is next (Timothy Olyphant’s next series)?

      John From Cincinnati–I’m not playing for that one

  2. Don’t get all point-stuff-outy. I guess I’ll be trying to use that one in the office or wherever for a few days.

    Enjoying Thoughts on the Deadwood. Great show…boomtown shakaspeare. Might be time for me to rewatch.

  3. The Libertarian line is brilliant. Consider it stolen.

  4. Luther Von Baconson

    July 12, 2016 at 11:40 am

    don’t have a teevee nor a computer at home. no cell phone either. but i do appreciate symmetry

  5. Brilliant. Now mini binge watching every day. Thanks for fucking up my spare time you cocksucking ditch for cum. God the dialogue was mellifluous.

  6. i had just started re-watching when he started this bit. it really is an amazing show. it feels to me like reading a good book.

  7. Love this show, best western ever. Every other character is mentall ill. You can smell everyones’ breath when they talk.

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