Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

School Daze

TotD has been banned from any and all academic conferences concerning the Grateful Dead. I was already on probation after summoning Abbadon the Unforgiving to the Marriott ballroom a few years ago, so the kidnapping of David Lestellablieux was not seen in the humorous manner it was intended.

(It’s rather easy to kidnap a Canadian. Saying “Come with me: I’m kidnapping you,” in a stern voice almost always works. They’ll stay put until you release them or they get shot in a botched rescue attempt.)

But I needed access! How else to hear the presentation of such papers as “Calliope Wail: A Second Look at TC” or “The Work of Man: A Queer Reading of the Weather Report Suite” or “Mirror Shatters: The Intersectionality of the Dead, Size-ism, and Body-Positivism?”

Luckily, the Museum of Modern Terrible Dead Art (Mom: ta-DAA!) had agreed to loan the Conference one of their most terrible pieces:

38_11-7-14_SJSU_Photo_by_Jamie_Soja_SojaPhotography_dot_com_-L-620x413

I came up with a brilliant plan: I would secret myself within the statue of a ‘Squatch dressed like Garcia. Then I would–under cover of darkness while the academics slept with one another–sneak out of my hiding place. It was such a good plan, I couldn’t understand why no one had tried it before.

What underhanded plots did I ferret out? What nasty secrets did I dig up?

TO BE CONTINUED!

You never continue stuff, though.

I will this time.

Really?

Sure.

PS Thanks for the pic go out to a person who lives nowhere near Seattle, Mr. Completely.

6 Comments

  1. I pose before t-shirts

    November 17, 2014 at 8:51 am

    Go to slide 4 in the slideshow below. Cathryn Bales? That’s Billy in makeup and drag, right?

    http://activate.metroactive.com/2014/11/grateful-dead-symposium-jams-out-at-sjsu/

    And slide 5. Did you you know the plural of “poster artist” is “posters artists”? It’s kind of like “sergeants-at-arms” or “mothers-in-law” only it doesn’t make sense.

  2. Ha! I would set the morning line at 99-1, 20-1, 12-1 and 1-9. No place and show wagering available.

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