Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

So Much To Ask?

….

Are you pouting?

It might be described that way, but I would disagree with the wording.

Sulking?

Closer.

Brooding.

Yes, like Batman. That is what I’m doing.

The video situation?

I feel unappreciated.

Oh, God.

Tell me I’m special.

For one definition of the word “special,” yeah.

All I asked for is for hundreds of man-hours of work and millions of dollars in intellectual property to be provided to me for free and on the specific platform I desire. And for the owners of said work and investors of said dollars to let me do it, even though it would explicitly weaken their claim on the copyright.

That’s not so much.

I would also like it right the fuck now.

This world breaks butterflies like you on the wheel, doesn’t it?

It does. Sometimes I think I have the most feelings of anyone in the world.

You’re unbearable.

I got a haircut and wrote a poem about it: wanna hear it?

We need to keep things on a professional level from now on.

Right. So: waiting on the innertubes to come through. It’s always doing great things for sick children, so I–

Don’t do this.

–invite Enthusiasts to picture me a a small, pale, bald child who–

Nope, nope, nope.

STEPSTEPSTEP doorSLAMM

kaCHuck

kaCHuck

kaCHuuuuuAHHHHHHGGAHOGGAHOGGAGOGGA

vrOOOOm krSREEEEEEEEEEECHBOOMANDBANG

SPRANG! CLATTER! SPLAT! Shplunk.

Was that a motorcycle?

Yeah.

Pulled out and got hit by an 18-wheeler?

Uh-huh.

You hurt?

I am not.

So, you’re Unbreakable?

Apparently. I cannot die.

Okay.

Nor can I leave.

Being semi-fictional has its ups and downs.

Stuck here forever?

Forever enough, I suppose.

Might be called Hell.

Perspective.

Didn’t this start out as a place to make fun of Billy?

Evolved a little.

Yeah.

You having a bit of a crisis, or can I finish haranguing the readers for their paltry tribute?

Please don’t phrase it that way.

Oh, I won’t.

26 Comments

  1. Also
    ToTD
    U were at the frickin show

    I DIDNT GET TO GO BC YOU FORGOT TO COME PICK ME UP
    STOP BROODING U SCRUB

  2. Saw “choogle” in a non Dead related article today, forget where

    It’s over sorry mang

  3. test

  4. [img]https://www.nerdist.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/shia-labeouf-magic-gif.gif[/img]

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