I HAVE HIRED ROGER STONE.
Roger Stone the legendary Republican trickster?
HE LEFT THE TRUMP CAMPAIGN. THIS IS A GAMECHANGER.
Oh, God: are we seeing that this election cycle, too?
HE IS COMPLETELY AMORAL. IT IS FASCINATING.
Yeah, you might wanna be careful with that guy.
I DO NOT NEED TO BE CAREFUL: I HAVE A DISINTEGRATION GUN.
Uh-huh. Where is it?
…
OH, NO.
Did Roger Stone steal your disintegration gun?
HIM OR BILLY.
That’s a problem either way, isn’t it?
YES. I WILL BLAME A LOW-LEVEL STAFFER AND GET BACK TO TALKING ABOUT JOBS FOR THE AMERICAN PEOPLE.
That was nice work right there.
WHEN YOU SIGN THE PAPERS ENTERING THE RACE, A SMALL BOMB IS IMPLANTED IN YOUR BRAIN WHICH GOES OFF IF YOU DON’T SAY “THE AMERICAN PEOPLE” EVERY FIVE MINUTES.
Do you have an actual brain?
THERE IS A SECTION OF ME THAT COULD ACCURATELY BE DESCRIBED AS “BRAIN-LIKE”.
Okay. Anyway: what does Roger Stone think about your campaign?
HE THINKS THAT I SHOULD RUN ON ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION.
Why?
PEOPLE WHO CARE ABOUT ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION WANT TO BUILD A WALL BETWEEN THE UNITED STATES AND MEXICO.
Right.
I AM A WALL.
Yeah, sure.
ROGER STONE ALSO THINKS I SHOULD BE ANTI-DRUG. HE SAYS I CAN COMBINE DRUGS AND IMMIGRATION INTO ONE MESSAGE.
And that is?
NUKE MEXICO.
Ah.
I FEEL THAT MAY CAUSE CONTROVERSY. ALSO, MEXICANS ARE LOVELY PEOPLE, EXCEPT FOR THE ASSHOLES.
That’s been my experience.
EVERYONE IS LOVELY, REALLY.
Russians?
THOSE WINTERS DO SOMETHING TO PEOPLE’S MINDS.
Yeah, maybe. You’re not actually gonna advocate nuking Mexico, are you.
I DO NOT ADVOCATE NUKING ANYTHING, EXCEPT THE TERRAFORMING FACILITIES ON LV-426.
It’s the only way to be sure.
I EMPATHIZE WITH NUCLEAR WEAPONS: HUMANS BUILT THEM WITHOUT THINKING ABOUT WHETHER THEY COULD HANDLE THEM.
You’re very deep tonight.
ROGER STONE BROUGHT OVER EDIBLES. HIGH AS AN ELEPHANT’S BALLS.
You ever find that disintegration gun?
OH, SHIT.
i think i like Phish more than the Dead now what do i do
u r ded 2 me
IM NOT DED YET BC IM NOT SURE AND I NEED HELP
JFC THEY ARE JUST SO ELECTRIC AND HAPPY AND FUCKING ROCK AND THEY MAKE ME FEEL SO CONNECTED AND I BET THE FACT THAT THEY ARE STILL AROUND AND EVERYBODY IS TWEETING ABOUT THEM IS DRAWING ME TO THEM A WHOLE LOT
Tweeting is dum and for dunmies
that’s why u do it
EM ETIF
im gonna go watch Close Encounters of the Third Kind and cry my face off
No dosing. Good movie. Never seen it.
oh shit wait did my other comment go through
i sent that too early and was going to say “dose me with the Dead” as in what show did you listen to today and can you please link it to me sorry for the misunderstanding IM NOT DRUG PERSON
it is a good movie. i thought Richard Dreyfuss was John Travolta cuz i was like 8 first time i saw it lol
u r racist 2 confuse them
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DuRBMQfHzjs&index=15&list=FLc2YN5tCsfiwzrcUpQCUPYA
h o l y shit u can see it lolololololololl
it’s ok tho i dont rlly care
reason i posted it is bc there is a John Travolta video in there
lol pls tell me u can’t see my youtube favorites playlist that was from like 2 yrs ago
SHIT
looks like it’s time https://i.warosu.org/data/cgl/img/0074/92/1397513628091.png
lel I remember in freshman year I went to physical therapy for my knee and once my physical therapist was out so a different girl filled in for him and I told her I liked the Dead and she asked me if I was into Phish and I said no and now I wish I could just go back and find her and tell her how different I am FUQQQQ
https://33.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8f3upuMfe1qg4blro1_500.gif
he’s so cute
Listen to anything from 1972. Pay attention to the lyrics. Focus on the instruments, especially the lead guitar. Repeat until well.
Oh, that made me giggle. I am no stranger to ’72. I appreciate your homeopathic recommendation — will do so right now.
Then dive into 73. Repeat as needed.
Songs, not wordshit hurled at a turdburger.
Teenagers jumping from one all time favorite thing to another. Surprising.
Time to start your THOUGHTS ON THE PHISH blog. Maybe ToTD can become an obsessed fan commenting there. Bizarro world.
I WILL COMMENT ON UR BLOG WITH MY DANK MEMES I AM A TEEN FLEEK MOM
TEEN MOMS ARENT HIP????????????????????????
DO NOT TEEN MOM
I’M NOT????????????? I BARELY LEAVE THE HOUSE TEEN MOMING IS NOT COOL
ur a teen mom
ur hitler teen mom
U R UR OWN TEEN MOM
Jerry Seinfeld
https://youtu.be/dfBdBpr7KCo
we in this bitch, finna get crunk, eyebrows on fleek, dafuq
It kills me that this blog has got me, a man in his fifties,using the phrase ‘on fleek’ on a regular basis. Thankfully not in public, but it’s been one of those things I say to myself in reference to many nifty things and crack up about. The dog thinks I’m crazy. But his eyebrows are definitely on fleek, so what does he know?
this make me chortle mightily
Your not alone.
You’re not wrong. If you met 7th grade me you would be encountering a walking nightmare.
legit tho lolol i should blog more i never even write on my blog
Hey elephant balls, how many more edibles before you’re higher than a Giraffe’s eyebrow?
Damn, I’m hungry
maggiemay, also known as swaggy maggie, you don’t have to choose one or the other. but i think that if you really look into it, you will see that the dead are a better band, more important culturally, and more likely to last you into old age. i am loving them now more than ever — especially with all of the shows totd and the comments crew are recommending. i have seen phish, and they are a nice little band. i was backstage at that concert, and even got into the bathtub onstage. but on this solemn day, as i listen to standing on the moon on infinite loop, i say, as your mother, that the dead are the more lasting choice. trey — cute. the bobster — cuter.
Dawn (Mom), that was such a wonderful comment. Thank you. 🙂 This is the kind of guidance I need! I asked Mr. Completely for some recommendations earlier today, and he suggested Springfield Civic Center (3/28/73) and I just got around to listening to it right now. As soon as they broke into the jam in Here Comes Sunshine I remembered why I love this band so damn much. So much going on all at once. Billy recently described their style as “dixieland” (which I admittedly love too), not due to the kind of music they play, but how they play it. Everyone is doing their own thing at once and it’s simply mind-bending. Grateful Dead is great music for musicians and hippies alike. 🙂
Also very cool that you’ve been backstage at Phish!