Hey, Croz. Whatcha thinking about?
“A beach where the sand is all cocaine.”
Nice. What about you, Phil?
“I’d like tacos.”
“Oh, I could go for tacos.”
“Couple of beers?”
“You’re speaking my language.”
“Let’s hit it.”
ROCK STARS LEAVING THE ROOM NOISE
Did they just leave?
Yeah. They went to get tacos.
Oh, I could go for tacos.
ITALIC-AMERICAN LEAVING THE ROOM NOISE
Hi, Mr. Davis.
“Get the fuck in. We’re getting tacos.”
“Knock it off.”
What’s Mickey wearing?
“The material is called brocade.”
How do you pronounce that?
“Rhymes with ‘Joe Fade.'”
Is Joe Fade a pool player you used to know?
You are interesting as fuck, Croz.
“Good morning. We welcome you on behalf of the Ethiopians.
“We’re gonna get started in just a second. We’ve got some great bands on the lineup, and we also have George Thorogood. Both Durans are here. Joe Piscopo is one of our celebrities, so who knows what crazy mishegos is gonna take place? Piscopo’s a wild card.
“Some short announcements before we get started.
“There is a blue Chevy Caprice in the parking lot with its lights on. License plate number RVA-119.
“Fuck Paul Simon.
“And finally: Philadelphia, you are a rock and roll town. Like my good friend Huey Lewis, who can also go fuck himself, says: the heart of rock and roll is in Philadelphia. We couldn’t do this show anywhere else. So, that said: please do not throw D batteries at the performers. If you want to keep throwing them at the cameramen and roadies, then go to it. But not the performers, please. If you must throw batteries at the stars, then keep it to a double-AA.
“Except Stephen Stills. You can throw car batteries at that putz for all I care. You see what he’s wearing, that putz?
“Look at him. Captain of the USS Cocaine. Putz. I’m wearing a long-sleeve button-down shirt with shorts and I still have moral standing to critique his outfit. That’s how much of a putz he is, that putz.
“Okay, so here we go. Feel free to get loose with each other and boogie. Tee-shirt concessions are open.”
Here’s how high David Crosby is in this photo: he can’t gesture.
And there’s never been a story told about Stills where he didn’t come off like proto-Bieber.