bobby mickey schmuck
Hey, Bobby.

“Oh, hey.”

Nice watch.

“John Mayer bought it for me.”

Interesting. Not surprising, but interesting.

“I think he wants to be my Benjy Eisen.”

No. He wants to be your Garcia.

“That ain’t happening.”

Duh.

“Garcia was a lot of things, but he was never a douche. He could be a prick. Occasionally, he was a real turd. Sometimes, he was just an asshole, y’know? Never a douchebag, no.”

What’s Mickey doing back there?

“I’ll answer that question the same way I’ve been answering it for half-a-century: not a fucking clue, man.”