Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

The Bus Came By And I Threw Up

“Jenkins!”

“I’m sitting on your lap, sir.”

“Oh, yes. Why are you doing that?”

“You call it ‘Santa Practice,’ sir.”

“Ah. How am I doing?”

“You have an erection, sir.”

“Well you must have been naughty.”

“I’m going to stand up.”

“I’m not. I’ve got a boner.”

“Yes, sir. What did you want to discuss?”

“I had a dream last night, Jenkins. I dreamt that I ate an entire box of crayons and then projectile vomited onto some glossy paper. What do you think that means?”

“No idea, sir.”

“So many colors that nothing at all made sense. Have you heard of minimalism, Jenkins?”

“Of course, sir.”

“This was the opposite.”

“Maximilism.”

“Stop making up words, Jenkins.”

“Yes, sir.”

“And there were bears and skeletons and buses and roses and flying eyeballs and you were there, Jenkins. And you two farmhands.”

“Who are you talking to, sir?”

“The farmhands.”

“Hello.”

“Howdy.”

BANG!

BANG!

“You shot the farmhands, sir.”

“Their existence was only required for that one joke, Jenkins. Let’s get back to the poster.”

“Is that what we were talking about?”

“Let’s see: first, I sexually harassed you, then I told you my dreams, and then I shot two farmhands. Yes, we’re talking about the poster.”

“Excellent, sir.”

“Bring me some paper, a box of crayons, and a bottle of Ipecac.”

“What if we just let an artist do it?”

“But then I wouldn’t get to vomit up rainbows.”

“Yes, sir.”

6 Comments

  1. Can someone explain the mushroom cloud between yellow bear and grey bear?

    • Thoughts On The Dead

      June 18, 2017 at 10:59 pm

      I was looking at that, too.

      “Jenkins, you know what’s fun?”
      “What, sir?’
      “Nuclear bombs!”

    • It’s the noxious waste / gas spewing out of the head of Yellow Bear as he/she touches his/her joint to the portable nitrous cup he/she is holding in his/her hand. This inhalation / “exhalation,” combined with the “digestif” distress from eating a ball park frank has caused an erection to emerge from the mushroom and give pleasure to Happy (Gray) Bear above.

      At least, that’s what it looks like to me.

      Fuckin’ bears . . .

      The most horrible series of posters in the history of rock music.

  2. Maximalism is a thing. Check out the interior decorator Tony Duquette.

    This poster is terrible.

  3. Glad to see Jenkins is back from Phish tour.

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