Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

The Grateful Dead Broadway Musical: Scene One


(Tie-dyed curtain rises to reveal BOB WEIR, played by Ben Vereen in his Pippin costume. He wanders across the stage with a guitar slung on his back.

The set is a SAN FRANCISCO STREET SCENE. The house from 710 Ashbury is STAGE LEFT. Magoo’s is STAGE CENTER. Dana Morgan’s music shop is STAGE RIGHT.)


Kickin’ around
This foggy old town
The streetcars, they don’t know my name.

I’d rather be ropin’
And punchin’ and pokin’
And back at my home on the range.

(As he is walking by Dana Morgan’s, he stops. There is BANJO MUSIC coming from behind the door. He knocks, and JERRY GARCIA, played by Patti Lupone, answers. He looks at Bobby, then up and down the street.)

Well, hey, how are you, buddy?
All my students are real late.

Well, hey, I don’t think they’re coming.

Why not, man?

Check the date!

(A spotlight illuminates the 1964 calendar in the window of Dana Morgan’s. All the days are X’ed out up until December 31st.)

My evening’s opened up
My name’s Jerry; how’d you do?

I do pretty darn well
The name’s Bobby Double-U.
You can see I’ve got my gee-tar
And I’ve got a joint as well

Then come in, friend, and tune up
And we’ll give these steel strings hell.

And we’ll jam jam jam jam jam.
Yes, we’ll jam jam jam jam jaaaaaaaam!

(A GREEK CHORUS made up of DANCING BEARS enters and begins NOODLE DANCING.)


  1. Luther Von Baconson

    June 6, 2017 at 10:23 pm

    i hear a Bouncy C

  2. allthebeerscombine

    June 7, 2017 at 10:57 am

    Matthew Broderick = Ned

    Nathan Lane = Vince

  3. allthebeerscombine

    June 7, 2017 at 10:59 am

    David Hyde Pierce = Keith

    Idina Menzel = Mrs. Donna Jean

  4. hugh.c.mcbride

    June 7, 2017 at 1:21 pm

    Saw “Grateful Dead Musical” on JamBase, first thought was “ah, this is gonna make for some good times on ToTD*.”

    Was not disappointed in the least 🙂

    Yes, “good times on ToTD” is quite the redudancy. As always, thank you for a real good time …

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