Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

The Ruination Of Swaggie Maggie By The Lothario Bobert Weir

bobby tank les paul 72

“Um.”

“You okay there, fella? Need some green tea?”

PEOPLE AREN’T SUPPOSED TO BE ABLE TO LOOK THIS GOOD AND DO STUFF.

“We’re discussing my handsomeness?”

Yes. It’s supposed to render a human completely useless, this level of handsomitude.

“Well, that just wasn’t where my bliss lived, y’know?”

You’re starting with the bliss already? It’s ’72.

“You kidding me? Bliss was my second word.”

What was the first?

“Doggy.”

I can see that, sure.

Your hair just did that on its own, too, didn’t it?

“Woke up like this.”

27 Comments

  1. maggiemay

    https://thoughtsonthedead.files.wordpress.com/2013/08/bobby-mosseknuckle.jpg
    I h o p e y o u r a i r c o n d i t i o n e r b r e a k s t o d a y

    • PC

      These pants must have been specifically tailored to feature: BALLS!!

      It’s like a fanny pack for testicles.

      • maggiemay

        Honestly though. Who in their right mind would wear these? Not to mention take a picture like this????

        TotD, take notice; PC called it “a fanny pack for testicles.” Because testicles are outside of the body, and are therefore able to be put into a fanny pack. LÄMĘ-Ø

        • thoughtsonthedead

          I can put my hand in a fanny pack, and my hand is inside my body, spaz.

          • maggiemay

            WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN

            NO UR HAND IS OUTSIDE UR BODY IT’S NOT INSIDE OF U IT’S DEXTROUS AND INJURE-ABLE UNLIKE, SAY, UR KIDNEYS, WHICH ARE INSIDE OF U

          • thoughtsonthedead

            U CAN TOTALLY INJURE UR KIDNEYS

          • maggiemay

            okay, yes, you can, but I cannot walk up to you and grab your kidneys and squeeze/punch/kick them to the point of injury, because they’re INSIDE of you. I could, however, grab your hand, (OR YOUR WEAK ASS TESTICLES, FOR THIS MATTER) and injure it somehow (though I probably wouldn’t be able to hurt your extremities with my bare hands).

          • thoughtsonthedead

            leave me alone i am working on jokes and powerful truths

          • maggiemay

            thats something someone who knew they were wrong and had no good comebacks would say

            because u know u r wrong

      • maggiemay

        “They [balls] are located within the [coin purse], which… hangs outside the body behind the [wang].”

        the real words were too gross for me but yeah this was from a MEDICAL WEBSITE IM NOT OVER THIS BC I KNOW IM RIGHT

      • PC

        I think the balls “outside vs. inside” debate will be difficult to resolve between a guy and gal, since it’s only natural for we guys to see the balls as central to our bodies proper – after all, that region is our primary cognitive structure.

        And pretty sure Bobby is coaxing whatever female is on the room during that photo session to come on over and have a seat on his lap…

  2. spencer

    http://i.imgur.com/hIOZxc2.gif

  3. Dawn

    what year did bobbie get kicked out of boarding school? this must have been right after. and look at poor maggie!

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