Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Things TotD Will Not Bring Up On The Radio

  • How to solve the Israel/Palestine thing.
  • Rumors about how large Huey Lewis’ dong is.
  • Trepanation.
  • Jade Helm.
  • Weaponized stampedes.
  • Intra-band politics.
  • Inter-band politics. (I will refrain from talking about the trade deal the Dead just signed with the Foo Fighters.)
  • I will not do my Bill Walton impression and tell made-up stories about Coach Wooden.
  • Big-Dicked Sheila. (Sorry, gorgeous. You know I love you, but they just wouldn’t understand.)
  • Precarious Lee.
  • Also: T-shirt Tuesday, the Briefcase of Infinite Felonies, Little Aleppo, the Dead’s involvement in the white slave trade, the Wall of Sound becoming sentient, Brent’s numerous sexual perversions.
  • I have 45 minutes to think of a better compliment for a musician than “motherfucker.”
  • And, yeah: it’s satellite and you can say it, I suppose, but: no. TotD is for the children.
  • State’s rights.
  • “Innocently” wonder how Mrs. Donna Jean is.
  • Tell you what I will do, though: remember how Carol Burnett used to do the earlobe thing at the end of her monologue to let her husband or children know she was thinking about them?
  • Potato salad might be mentioned, and when it is: that’s for you, Enthusiasts.

5 Comments

  1. Very sad that I will miss this. Going to movies at 4. Knock ’em dead kid.

  2. I’m surprised you didn’t give a shout out to Trixie.

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