Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Things Yelled At U.S. Rep. Jason Chaffetz (R-UT) At Last Night’s Town Hall

  • Boo!
  • Hiss!
  • You’re a wizard, Harry!
  • Please, God, for all that’s holy: do something!
  • Head’s Up! (There was a softball game next door, and someone hit a foul ball into the crowd.)
  • Вы делаете замечательную работу! Пожалуйста, продолжайте по тому же пути!
  • Jason! It’s Timothy! We met at the Ramrod the other night! I was one of the guys who came on you! Why haven’t you called?
  • Your head looks like Vanessa Del Rio’s crotch, you gimlet-eyed fuck!
  • Has the president grabbed you yet, pussy?
  • Bingo! (That woman was in the wrong room.)
  • Vile and deceitful cur, your shame and cowardice reeks like an unwashed asshole!
  • Was this how you thought it would go? Honestly, Jason: was this what you saw in your mind’s eye as the status quo three weeks into his term?
  • Look out for the raccoons! (Mickey was there; he threw a duffel bag full of furious raccoons at the congressman. The act received the only cheer of the night.)


  1. Don’t sully the name of Vanessa Del Rio with this Tea Party moralist who is bereft of any scruples(wasn’t he still more concerned a couple weeks ago with prosecuting Benghazi than any problems that might arise from Trump’s cronies? I guess Russian General Mike Flynn might change Mr Chaffetz’s plans to prosecute Hillary). The only thing I can say to Jason is it must not be fun when the rabbit has got the gun.

  2. Too bad Jerry never played a guitar named Tigress.

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