Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Wherever I May Roam

john mayer earthroamer kneeling


“Huh? Huh? You like it?”

“Welp. Yeah. That’s a thing.”

“You don’t like it.”

“It’s a little big.”

“It’s a house with an engine.”

“How’s it move with that tent affixed to the ground?”

“Tent rolls up, Bob.”

“That’s good American design, there.”


“What kind of mileage that sucker get?”

“Terrible. Again: house with an engine. Nothing that has a toilet gets good mileage.”

“You didn’t tell me you could poop in it.”

“I’d prefer you didn’t, Bob.”

“And I’d prefer you didn’t rope me into your search for zaftig teen queens: we can’t always get what we want. Now step aside: I’m gonna poop in your car.”


“Josh, could you step on it? My sister-in-law sees this thing and I gotta take another tour of that damn Tesla factory.”

“We’d get going faster if you helped me with the tent.”

“Right after I poop.”


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