Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Who Got Fired From ESPN?

  • The guy who maybe wears a piece.
  • That lady whose ethnicity your mother tries to guess.
  • Fatty.
  • Bald fellow.
  • The one who wears bow ties.
  • The guy who won’t stop talking about sports.
  • Hockey person.
  • Woman who’s always on air when you go to the gym, no matter what time it is.
  • Trent Dilfer.
  • The young dude who talks about boxing, and you’re like, “People still box? What about the dog track results?”
  • Lady golf reporter with sensible haircut and powerful calves.
  • Sportsbot, a humanoid robot with AI so advanced it could come up with a hot take in less than milliseconds.

Stephen A. Smith still has his job, because God is on His coffee break this year.


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