Hey, Pope Francis. Whatcha doing?

“I’m-a hanging out witta da Globies!”


“They da clown princes of-a da basketball! Come-a to da Vatican, set-a up da hoop, do-a da show.”

All that just for you?

“It’s-a good to be da Pope.”


“They do all-a da tricks. Throw-a confetti, ball on-a da string. One-a guy, he dribble da ball real good. Other guy talk-a real loud.”

That sounds like the Globetrotters.

“Same-a routine for 50 years.”

With all due respect, you’re one to talk, Your Holiness.

“Is not-a da same! Mother Church is-a unchanging because-a da God. Is-a what He said to do, so cannot-a change.”

That’s not true. The Church changes all the time.

“Like-a when?”

Vatican II.

“When-a else?”

Vatican I, I guess.

“Is all-a da sequels nowadays.”

Sure. Are you following the American elections, Pope Francis?

“Look-a my face.”

Pope leads general audience in St. Peter's Square at Vatican

I’ll take that as a yes.

“What-a the fuck wrong witta alla you?”


“Scusi. I forgive-a myself.”