Thoughts On The Dead

Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Twelve Normal New York City Conversations And One That Isn’t

  • Mets suck, huh?
  • We can’t make ends meet on half-a-million a year.
  • I liked him, but he lives in Staten Island.
  • Did you know that Mayor DiBlasio is precisely 1.78 Mayor La Guardias high?
  • I think that knock-off Elmo just stabbed a child.
  • What the fuck is that smell?
  • Didn’t that bank used to be a cobbler’s shop?
  • Didn’t that bank used to be a diner?
  • Didn’t that bank used to be a different bank?
  • I think the smell is urine, but from a very sick person or maybe a dying goat.
  • Wait, you don’t have pot delivered by models?
  • Ugh, the South Bronx is full of white people now.
  • I need you, the FBI director, to swear fealty to me, the President of the United States.


  1. You forgot “the Mets need to smoke more pot”

  2. Drink all day rock all night

    June 7, 2017 at 9:00 pm

    Wow that Grateful Dead musical is a hotter ticket than Hamilton ever was.

    • I hate the grateful dead and all the smelly people that like them, but I must confess I do like the musical

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